 The other day on social media, I came across a post talking about the best strategy to use when you're trying to build a business and make more sales. SEO blog posts? Instagram? Facebook ads? Pinterest? Which strategy will give the biggest possible return? Which strategy will make the most money? To answer these questions, the author of the post simply said: "That's like asking... Pants? Skirt? Shorts? What's right to wear today?" (Essentially, she's inferring, what's right is whatever feels best... to you.) As you can see, this stuck with me. Mostly because I'd never seen anyone put the conversation of "best strategy" into such a simple terms. It got me thinking... Is strategy really a matter of preference? So much so that the strategy I use to feel better and manage my autoimmune disease might be a matter of preference, too? Exercise... Diet... Essential oils... Restorative yoga... Meditation... EFT... Could the best way to feel better and heal from autoimmune disease be a matter of choosing and committing to whatever feels right... to me? If so, how do I figure that out? How do I navigate between all of the things I should do or am supposed to do or have been told to do in order to find the strategies that will work the best? Here are 10 questions to ask yourself to uncover the best and fastest way for YOU to feel better when managing autoimmune disease or chronic illness. These are really powerful questions to answer BEFORE investing a ton of time, money and energy into a healing protocol, as they help make sure you're primed and ready for that protocol to work for you. You see, maybe there isn't some secret healing tool we haven't yet found. Maybe there isn't a perfect way to get where we want to go. Maybe there isn't actually a best, most "right" tool to use. Maybe there isn't a way to guarantee the result we want to see -- to feel better, heal, get into remission, or whatever else.
Maybe the best way to manage and heal from autoimmune disease and chronic illness is to follow whatever strategy feels right to you... by getting really clear on what works and feels good to you. 10 Qs to help you manage autoimmune disease (and pick the healing strategy that's best for you)
To begin, grab a journal and simply start writing. What does health mean to you? What does it mean to heal? Do you want remission? To get off medication? To be out of pain? To simply feel better? Does health include mental and emotional well-being? Do you value food freedom? What does "food freedom" even mean? What's important for your mental and emotional happiness? How does that impact your physical well-being or definition of health? The very first thing you need to do is get clear on where you actually want to go. After all, the destination of "health" is different for all us... just like a successful business or full bank account would be. For me, I wanted to get off medication and feel really, really good. Part of feeling good meant taking care of my mental and emotional health. I valued feeling free around food* -- and accessibility -- as much as I valued physical health. *Food freedom for me means knowing I could eat any food not that I do eat any food.
What do you think you'll feel and experience once you have what you want? Do you expect to feel happy? Joy? Content? At peace? Abundant? Expansive? Danielle LaPorte of The Desire Map talks about, what she calls, our core-desired feelings. She was the very first person to introduce to me a concept of goal setting that more easily helps us get where we want to go. She reminds us that it's not necessarily the thing itself we really want... but rather the feeling(s) we think that thing will bring. For example, it's necessarily the money that we want but rather the feeling of abundance, safety or ease. It's not necessarily the cure that we need but rather the feeling of control, possibility or security. For me personally, it wasn't just that I wanted to get off medication. I wanted the ease and space I thought getting off medication (and being in remission) would bring. You see, I was diagnosed when I was 14. (I'm 29 at the time of writing this post). I wanted the space that I thought would come from not having a sector of my life in need of constant attention. I wanted the ease that I thought would come from not worrying about my health. Yes, I wanted to get off medication and get into remission. (So that tangibly I could stop taking the medication and experiencing the side effects.) But also, I wanted the ease, space and freedom that I thought being in remission would bring. By tapping into how you want to feel once you get where you want to go, you can start intentionally adding into your life (right now) more activities, experiences and thoughts that help you feel how you want to feel. Meaning, we can speed up the process by helping you feel better right now and by letting your journey fully and completely inform your destination.
Thinking of what you want (both the tangible goal and the feelings associated): What have you been told would be required? What conditions have you placed on health? For example, do you believe you have to eat a certain way to feel really good or get off medication? Do you think you have to meditate for a certain amount of time each day or make changes to your work-life balance? Do you believe it will be easy or hard to have the health you want and/or feel how you want to feel? This is such an important question to ask ourselves because, whether we realize it or not, many of us have certain health "rules" leading the way. There are strategies or healthy behaviors (such as diet, exercise, meditation, stress-management, etc.) that we believe we must do (often perfectly) in order to have health, feel good, be in remission, etc. For example, I used to think I would have to eat according to the autoimmune protocol if I wanted to get off medication and feel better. As much as I didn't want it to be true, I had read so many success stories and done so much research that I thought food was the *only* path. (P.s. If you can't think of anything, ask yourself whether or not you think it's possible to get where you want to go. Do you think you ever could be a happy, healthy human who feels really good? Start there.)
Are you okay with and excited about the possibility of using dietary changes to feel better? Do you want to use essential oils or meditation or a certain exercise practice? What healthy actions feel good and interesting and even fun to you? Do you love talking walks outside? Do you enjoy journaling or practicing EFT? Basically, if you got to pick, what healthy actions would you take on a daily basis? If you knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that whatever you did WOULD work (i.e. get you what you want), what would you do? Personally, I was open for a few things to be required. I was willing and happy to practice restorative yoga, meditation and EFT. (Not daily, but regularly.) I wanted to spend time in my journal adopting a "wellness mindset" and rewriting my thoughts and beliefs. I was open to removing A1 casein (a protein found in certain types of cow dairy) as I thought I had an intolerance. It's a really powerful practice to not only get clear on HOW you want to move towards health (the actions you want to take) but also get clear on what you're not willing to do. Although I thought it was required, I truthfully didn't want to eat AIP. It took me a long, long time to admit this to myself, but I wasn't willing to give up one of my most favorite foods: fries. It sounds silly (which is why I fought myself for so long and even why I developed a way to restrict foods without feeling restricted) but I eventually realized that the ability to heal WHILE eating fries represented mental, emotional and soulful health that I wasn't willing to compromise. As you start answering these questions, you have a lot of really powerful information at your fingertips. You know where you want to go, what you believe you need to do to get there and what you WANT to be required. (In other words, what you're actually willing to do.) In order to feel better in the fastest amount of time, you want to line up the actions you're taking with what you think is required. If these two items don't line up... then you want to change either (1) where you want to go, (2) what you've decided is required or (3) the actions you're choosing to take. I chat more about these three questions (and why they're SO powerful) in this blog post here.
When have you seen results? What has helped you feel how you want to feel? As you think about both the health you want and the feelings you desire, what works and what doesn't? Are there any hidden stressors that might be getting in your way? This question is designed to help you gather even more personalized data. So often, we're creating our healthy lifestyle plans based on the success stories or research gathered from someone else. While we can use all of this to inform our decisions, it's a lot easier to stick to a plan we feel that we've created. It's easier to do something we've decided is best for ourselves rather than follow something someone else says to do. It's a subtle difference but the more empowered we feel the less we have to rely on motivation, willpower and discipline. (Which is really great because those things are finite and don't seem to work for the long-term!) For me, restorative yoga and journaling have helped tremendously. I notice I feel really good when I follow these practices regularly. Limiting the amount of A1 casein in my diet, taking regular walks outside and processing emotions with friends and coaches / therapists have all helped, too. What didn't work (how I implemented it in the past) was intense exercise, strict diet or trying the latest and greatest in self-care hoping that would be *the thing*. (P.S. One note here -- You DO want to work with your doctor and team of medical professionals to compile your healthy lifestyle plan. What I'm talking about here are the stress management and lifestyle habits we adopt to complement whatever treatment we're already receiving. I'm not a doctor and you're (probably) not a doctor, so it's important to be under the supervision of trained medical professionals we trust.)
Forgetting about the direct results you see, which tools just feel the best? Which tools are you curious about trying next? This is very similar to the question above where we look at what we want to be required, but it's another way to start thinking about all of the different tools that can help us reduce stress and feel better If you're not limited to one particular healing path, what would you try? What would you experiment with? How would you want to spend your "healing time"? Personally, I'm really attracted to thought and belief work. It feels really good, it's fun, I enjoy it and I want to learn more about it. That curiosity feels like a sign. I believe there's always a way to get where I want to go in a way that feels good to me and so I want to follow those nuggets of inspiration. I'm interested in manifestation and the law of attraction and I want to apply these concepts to health.
We just can't forget about accessibility. Simply put, the best health strategy is whatever strategy you can implement consistently. So, what's actually realistic for this season of your life? What can you reasonably expect and ask of yourself? This is one of the reasons I love thought work so much. It's one of, if not the, most accessible tools at our disposal. (You know, cause it's always available and doesn't monetarily cost a thing ;)) However, when I'm a stage of grief around autoimmune disease, thought work doesn't feel so accessible. Just like dietary changes don't feel accessible when I'm experiencing split health stress. What works best for one person isn't automatically what works best for another. Allow yourself to think about what you can reasonably incorporate into your life. For some, that might be a strict diet. It might feel good. For others, that might walks outside at lunch. For others even, it might be meditation or breath work or the use of essential oils. Whatever it is, give yourself the permission to consider the strategies that actually feel realistic right now -- and build from there. (Because it all counts.)
The goal of these questions as a whole is to help you get clear on how to actually feel better. We're deducing what's the best and fastest way for you to get where you want to go. We're looking at the end goal you have in mind, the beliefs you hold about getting there plus your interests and motivations and what's going to feel the easiest for you to implement. We're also looking at what's worked in the past, what's accessible and what simply feels right. Now, I do know that this can feel like a really odd factor to consider. Because so often we're not thinking about what feels right to us... because we're only thinking about what others have said is right. We typically spend a lot of time looking outside of ourselves for answers. We look towards experts. We look towards those who know more. We look for guarantees and solutions and the keys to health. And it feels really foreign to think that we might know best what to do. So, simply explore with me for a moment. As you journal and check in with yourself, what feels like the right next step to take? What do you think is the most loving thing you could do?
This is the golden ticket question! This one took me months to figure out. Basically, when will it be okay for us to get what we want? When are we "deserving of health"? What do we have to do before we can expect to feel good? How much effort, time or money do we need to put in? How hard do we have to work before we've "earned it"? What I didn't realize for a long time was that I walked around with a belief that said... "I get to have health once I'm the perfect patient who treats her body like the temple it is." I was moralizing the health and wellness conversation. Holding myself and how I treated my physical body to the upmost standards. I was expecting perfection from myself because I thought God was expecting perfection from me. I thought I had to be a perfect patient -- the definition of health from an action standpoint -- before I could actually reap those health rewards. So, when will you have done enough? This isn't just about what you believe is required. It's also about how much time/money/energy/resources you have to put in AND when you think you'll finally "deserve" to have what you want. Which is a whole bigger conversation that often doesn't even have anything to do with health.
How can you believe that whatever feels best to do is enough? How can you feel deserving of health right now? How can you change what you believe is required to get where you want to go? How might your actions need to shift moving forward? This is where we focus on getting our goals to be in alignment with our beliefs to be in alignment with our actions. That's when we feel better, faster. Partially because we believe what we're doing is enough -- we ARE healing -- and because we're simply doing things that feel good. So, what if the best way to manage autoimmune disease from a lifestyle standpoint -- or the best health strategy you can use to feel better -- is literally whatever works best for you? Both from the standpoint of it literally works for you and gets you results (and you're not doing it just because you "should")... and also from the standpoint of it works and feels good to you. It's accessible. It's interesting. It's reasonable. It helps you feel happy, good, free, {insert anything else} here. Again, the goal is to get our actions in alignment with what we believe we have to do to feel better. Reflecting on these 10 questions will help you get those two puzzle pieces in place in the quickest amount of time, so that you really can feel better (faster). Want to dig in even deeper? Watch the corresponding video here!
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